i hope they know

I've realized that I am one of the luckiest people on the face of this planet. I have such amazing friends and a wonderful, supportive family. Moving to London is going to be one of the hardest things I've ever done emotionally. And the only part of it that is difficult is leaving my family and friends here. I have the most ridiculous family ever. And I mean that in the best way possible. Because I've realized how much of a crackhead I am myself. ha... Wonder where I got it? Seriously though, I always see my friends in these constant struggles with their families and it makes me so sad. Of course my family has their own issues, but when it comes down to it, we are all best friends and would do anything in the world for each other... Heck, so many people complain about "having" to hang out with their family... but I love it. I choose to hang out with my family when I can. Unfortunately I don't always get to see them as much as I would like, but when we do see each other, nothing has changed.

And I feel the exact same way about my friends. Sometimes I go months without seeing my best friends. It sounds sad and it is, but it isn't out of lack of care...and we always know that. We have that same understanding that even if we don't see each other for a while, that at any point we have each others' backs. Always. Even when I am overseas.

So after all this rambling... I guess all I'm trying to say is that I hope they know.... I hope my family and friends know that me leaving isn't by any means a jab at my love for them. Because this will be one of the hardest things for me to do. But I hope they know how amazing they are. And I hope they know that this is just what I have to do.

Transitionnnnnnns

I think I am ready for this transitional phase to be over. I kind of feel like my life is on hold and I don't think I like it. Not my life... I love my life. I am just not enjoying not moving forward. Being stagnate. Working a job most definitely not doing what I want to be doing. Kind of into someone. Can't act on that. That would just be stupid, right? Why do these things even happen? Hmmm. A mystery for sure.

In other news, I am getting much much closer. I have about a month and a half before the big move. Still waiting on loans to go through, but they have at least been approved. I've bought my plane ticket, paid for my Visa (although I still don't have it), got an awesome FlipSlide HD Camcorder and a Sony Cybershot Digital Camera that is amazing... sweep panorama and all... I also bought my parents a webcam and set them up on Skype. And made them practice since they are, to say the least, not at all tech savvy.

Other than that, just working too much... partying too much... and packing... and pondering on how to pack...

READY, SET, FLY. Okay, almost...

Timing

It's such an interesting thing really.

This Time in Two Months...

I will be moving into a flat with my lovely Londoner roomies. I kind of get chills down my spine when I really think about it. So anxious... Waiting on my loan and visa to get approved... Still have to set up a European bank account... Just dropped an extra 300 dollars today in visa fees and still haven't bought my plane ticket. I'm thinking by the end of the week I should be good to do that.

I did buy my Macbook finally! Not sure what to do with my G5 baby though... I can't take it with me, but I really don't want to sell it. Oh so torn. Part of me feels like "well, I will be back to the States at some point, right?"... but then the other part is saying "what if I completely fall in love with the city and want to stay there? Then I would have all this useless crap back home..." I dunno....

I've been really happy lately. Work can be frustrating at times. And it's even more frustrating trying to save up all this money that I know will be decreased by half once exchanged... But, as I was saying.... Regardless, I've been really happy lately. I feel I'm in a good place.

Back From the Roo

Well, I survived this past weekend at Bonnaroo. I had ten million times more fun this year than I did two years ago (not that I didn't have a great time then, too.. just sayin). I saw something like 22 bands or so... The Flaming Lips, Kings of Leon, Tori Amos, Phoenix, Medeski Martin and Wood, Stevie Wonder, Jay-Z, Dave Matthews, The Avett Brothers, Weezer, Regina Spektor, just to name a few. Absolutely amazing.

Also been working on London stuff. Semi-freaking out at this point because I have to reapply for my student loans. There was a new law passed regarding the way student loans are disbursed that keeps me from being able to reapply until July 1st... which is a little too close for comfort for me to the time I am leaving... And I can't apply for my student visa until my loans go through, so everything is going to be very last minute and incredibly stressful next month... I also have to set up an overseas bank account and yada yada. In a nutshell... lots to do...quite stressful... but crossing my fingers and hoping for the best. Also need to get rid of a LOT of my stuff... thinking about doing a yard sale if I can find time.

Been studying up on London lingo... It's probably a good thing that I know that "pants" refers to underwear.. not pants.

Off to do laundry and other productive things. Then hi-ho to work.

two week streak

So I'm ending what has been close to a two week-long streak of craziness. Well, sorta. So I am ending it for a day, ya see, then going to Bonnaroo for the rest of the week. Can't say that won't be crazy... I guess I just feel like I've deserved some sort of break? I've been in school for five years now and have taken summer classes during every summer break..and I'm about to start grad school...so I definitely won't have a break for a while, so.... wow, this is an awful run-on.

I guess I'm simply trying to say that I'm going to slow down the partying. After Bonnaroo.

: )

On another note-- I have had, within these past two weeks, some of the best times ever. I can't even begin to tell some of the crazy stories. Feel free to ask me sometime.

And, btw, arrogance is my least favorite quality in a person. No one in this world is awesome enough to treat people like crap and it be okay..well, except maybe Ryan Adams.

Time for an early night's sleep. Detox... and go.

A Back-Up Plan?? P-Shaw.

I've had two encounters in the past two days in which people have told me their back-up plans... I told both of them to stop.

Here's the thing-- Not that I don't think back-up plans are an okay thing to have (well, i sorta do)... that's beside the point... The people I have met that have told me their "back-up plans" have seemed as if they've convinced themselves that these plans are going to realize themselves. I just think they seem to work against people more than they do for them... So, I guess what I'm trying to say is don't have one. Live out your dream. If that doesn't work, live as close to it as possible. If that fails as well, live spontaneously.

That is all.

This summer is quite lovely thus far.